Baring my soul...

I sit here. Droning on and on. The mindless nonsense that spews from my mouth. Try to orient them. Only to be faced with blank stares. Meanwhile my subconscience focuses on the girl in pink. She came to me last night. She was a dream. Long smooth black hair. Eyes of truth. Innocence as she cried. I told her, "it would be okay". Wrapped my arms around her. I whispered to her, "I will never let you go." She cringes seeing the lie. Like a Cure video...the tears fall like rain. Wait...it is rain. Thanking the heavens it will cover her emotions. I can continue numb.

I was listening to an electronica/dance song. It is like trance or techno music. I am not sure if that is a poem based on that or just my own emotions. I miss you. I think about you every day. I see you are back. I am anxious. The baby is almost here. I can't wait to see him. This is the first time I have been this anxious. I am mostly not expecting anything until the event occurs. It is my reasoning to just let it happen. I have no control over her womb. Your absence makes me.... I am not sure how to put into words. It makes me question...has our time passed. Only to return later when everything will be back to normal. It was our season. We had a good run. You know...there was laughter. You were in my car. You held my hand the sun shone. The song came back on. LOL.I guess this is what trance does. It loosens my brain. There is rythm and dance. The girl in pink...I think she is real. Maybe I am going crazy. You know...I hope you do not mind. Thanks. You are a sweetheart. You are my sweetheart. I would have bought you flowers for the "day we do not mention." I did not have any cash. I was broke. I guess this ends now. The post that is. You know how i have to be dramatic.