i have lost the will to type...

i sit here on what feels like a saturday night. it is sunday. although it really feels like a saturday. i was gearing up to go out on the town and party up the night. instead i decided to stay home and spent some time riding the bikes with the kids thru this small town. took in all the sweet smells of the neighborhood. saw compadres pistiando y otros haciendo su arrachera.

sorry...it has been a while dear bloggers. i'm not sure what it is. is it the state of emotion I am in. i no longer have the energy to write down what i feel. if i write it down then i can never take it back. it is out there. it is like giving the dragon wings and a mouth full of teeth that can pierce my being. exposing all my blood and pains. dejando las penas fluir como el rio de lagrimas. mejor que la presa mantenga las pesadillas en sus lugar. no dejar que vuelen por el ambiente como papel descartado como basura. para que cualquiera se enteren de mi negro corazon.

is it really all that bad. no. i really can not say it is all that bad. there are times that everything is riding smoothly. like a clock. moving in the same direction.

marching to the same beat of a drum. i picture chanting and fire. people circling it with visions of naked screams. then around the corner we dive into the sea. where we whistle to a non-specific tune. swimming with all the pepinillos. y veramos al pepinillo marino conquistando el universo submarino. sorry. im just typoing away. some of it is lyrics and other thoughts.

well...bloggers have a good labor day. make sure to have a cook out for me. i wish i could have one. unfortunately, there is no money in this month's budget. a little concept that does not seem to go well with 6 and 8 year olds.